Monday Madness: Even Mama Needs a Break

When I was a young mom, I remember feeling so guilty if I did anything for myself such as go out to dinner with friends, take a nap or go for a walk by myself. There was always so much to do. The list was a never-ending rotating event of laundry, dishes, cleaning, rocking, sleepless nights and nursing/feeding tots.

I remember thinking "If I have downtime, how will all these tasks get done?"...

Thankfully, as time went on and with the help of older moms, I realized that I needed to make sure that I took time for myself. To give myself a break so that I could refresh and revive mentally and emotionally. When your family lets you know that you are the glue that holds them all together, you gotta make sure that you are taken care of mentally, emotionally and spiritually!

The type of downtime I have taken has changed over the years. Some years I just needed a nap while the kiddos were napping. Other times I would need an evening out. Or maybe it was a weekend with a friend and going to a conference.

About five years ago it changed significantly when we started fostering a little boy with severe mental/emotional/behavioral issues. His needs made it so that I was not sleeping at night and bearing the brunt of the young man's anger and physical aggression.

It became important necessary for me to get away from the drama/trauma and attempt to relax. After talking with the family, we made it so that every Friday while the young man was in school, it was my day to get away and do whatever I needed to do to relax. Sometimes I would just go grocery shopping by myself. Other times I would have lunch with a friend. Often I would take lunch and a book to a park.

I did that for a couple years and it was much appreciated.

After that young man moved on, I got out of the habit of taking breaks. I think part of it was that I thought I no longer "earned" the privilege to have an afternoon once a week. Then we had several babies in our home for long periods of time and time away was again not an option as we find so often with babies. They need mama always! So getting away became obsolete again...but I did work on getting naps when they did like I had with my older kiddos as babies.

Since our last baby left home, we brought our youngest son home to homeschool. Having him in a private school was no longer working out to his benefit. However, that also meant that mama once again had a lot more on her plate! As this little guy is 24/7 eyes on kiddo.

Recently all of us talked and it was decided that with the help of a couple of the girls, I would start having a couple hours every week to get away and do what I would like to do. Not just shopping, appointments or other necessary stuff. Granted, sometimes it works out that way. But to work on things that I enjoyed such as my blog, going to lunch with a friend or working on projects around the house.

As before, it doesn't always work out. In fact, as I write this, it's been a couple weeks since I was able to get away. However, I have learned that instead of waiting till I am exhausted, I make sure and pencil in time for mental, spiritual and emotional renewal. So that I can be the best wife and mother I can be for my family.

Praying your week is blessed,
Heid